My dreams

Sometimes its hard to answer some questions people ask . Why am I suddenly cold ? Are you serious ? Is that a test of my feelings ? I am way over these mind games .
Its funny how some people can start the damage and then wonder what happened . When I need help from people doesnt label me as a helpless person so that someone can just throw trash in my face.

If I ask for Ideas from you that doesnt mean that I have no single Idea in my head.When I told you something , I didnt require your judgement , or you to show me a cold shoulder .
So I never listen huh ? What was I doing when you were speaking then ?ohhh I remember I over rode your problems with mine . I might not have done many significant things to you life but I know I atleast tried doing a million little things which you can never realise .I wont talk anymore because Silent treatment is the best .

His Promises are like a love letter full of hope
Sipping deep down my veins
Permiating in my thoughts
Bringing Hope to the hopeless

His Promises are as Sure as the sun will rise
As Fresh as the morning dew
They engulf my heart
Releasing my heavy laden

His Promises lift me up
Taking me to a place of Joy
Neutralises my Doubts and fears
Oh my Lord ! You will forever fulfill your promises

Have you ever stood in front of the mirror and wonder who that person looking right at you is . I have !Sometimes I wonder if she is lost and will come back soon . But what if shes doesnt come back ?

My attitude towards my own reflection shows that I am lost in my own world . But what if the she doesn't turn back to be the person who she has always been ? In life a lot of things change . Aha ! Thats the answer . 1 thing I have come to realise is that we grow up and sometimes change from what we used to be . The things we liked 2 years ago can not be the things we like now . The people we were close to can not be as closer to us as they used to be , I guess thats part of growing up .

But what if people attitude towards you have changed ?Does it mean that you have to change because people want you to be what they want you to be ? I think not , change is bound to happen .Its just up to us to ask ourselves , Have I changed for the better or for worse ? Thats what matters .

When it comes to expressing our feelings , few of us are more honest than children . I remember some time back when my mother was struggling to make my niece to obey . When she asked her why she would not do as she was told , my young niece said " Ma , I just dont want to!" That did not stop my mother from producing a rod and spanking her ! hahaha

Many of us as Christians are not that honest . We make excuses for not obeying God's will, when the real reason may be that we just dont want to do it .For example when I first came to Russia , I started reducing the number of times I would read the bible and pray . Later when I started adapting to this place I found an excuse for spending a little time in prayer . I thought that I was busy with the debts which I had to clear .

When I changed to english medium I still did not read the bible and pray regularly or go to church . Now when I sit down and think about this I have come to realise that I did all that not because I was not really familiar with St. Petersburg or the people .My real problem was that I simply did not do it because I was lazy .

1 John 5:3 which states that : This is the love of God , That we keep His commandments. This is where our answer comes from . I now have a family here , which encourages me and always there for me . Thank you All Nations International Christian Center . Thank you Students for Christ (SFC) , for your encouragement .

Yeah that's right ! I am now officially in 3rd year . Summer is over marking the new beginning of my school year . I wasnt looking forward to school but its gotten me falling in love with it .

My classmates are back from the holiday , damn! It was nice seeing you guys again . Guess what ? Nothing has changed between us .Same old desk mate , M & M is just beginning .
Same old class gossips on the round table , the table is not visual .Talking about class affairs and whose is gonna miss class tomorrow . Not forgetting the class debates which spices up break time .Same old guys to make me crazy, Hey papparazi ! arghhhh!!
To: My desk mate
Lets keep rolling and sit together because its M & M baby !The written class letters we write to each other are coming soon .That is if the teacher is making me want to sleep & If I have the latest news class (gossip)! heheheh
To:The round table
Fafa is back and you know how we roll . You know I dont back down when It comes some crazy class arguments . I sometimes know that what I am saying is wrong but you guys know how I back up my point.Fafa is always Fafa!hahaaa
To: 3rd Year
Remember its not 275, 276 or 277 ... Its now 375 , 376,377 . Theres now peace in class but I know soon the wars will start soon .So bring it on !!!

I recently read a story about a man in Michigan who was trying to remove a tree stump from the yard of a friend . An Idea came in his head , he decided to use some dynamite which he had stored away in his house . It did the trick . But guess what happened ? The explosion turned the stump into an airborne missile that travelled for almost 163 feet down range before crashing through the neighbours roof.oops!
The stump opened a 3 foot hole in the roof , split the rafters and pushed through the ceiling of the dining room.oops! again that was alot of damage which the dynamites caused .
Sometimes I see myself in the action of a dynamite just like other people.We have used explosive words ad actions to try solve problems but it makes things worse .I can say I get the action but it just worsen the things sometimes .Instead of fixing or getting what I desire I just leave much damage in my wake .

Wait a minute , just like alot of people am not the first person to let anger make trouble for me especially when someone steps on my toes . It happened to people in the bible too .Moses for instance became furious and extremely frustrated at his followers when they ran out of water in the desert . Instead of speaking to the rock to get water as he was instructed he struck the rock twice.

Anger like dynamite is explosive .Thats why sometimes when you say something provocative and I dont talk back that doesnt mean that I am foolish .I just try to prevent the anger in me from getting unleashed and causing problems .When a persons temper gets the best of him , it reveals the worst of him .